"Yes, I DO like to touch little boys bums, but I don't like to make a habit of it."
-Jay B on his pedophiliac tendancies
Wednesday, May 31st, 2000
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Having homosexual tendancies? Can't figure out what that strange lump is on 'Mr. Happy'? Don't understand why nobody really respects you or pays any kind of attention to you except to throw various pointy objects at you? Jay B knows how you feel! Hell, your question and answers will even be put up on RB!
You Guys Suck!
So, think you can suck dick better than EJ? Send us a picture of you naked and we'll be sure to masturbate to it for hours!

Hatemail 2.0!
Ever had that urge to annoy JayB and Larmal to your hearts content? Here's your chance, just press the button to spew off countless hatemails...

Thursday June 1st, 2000

The war is over
update | Thursday June 1st | Spitfire
My friends, I believe everything to be done in this war has been done.

In summary, I created a hatemail button on rappablords and introduced the idea of floodpinging EJ, which I honestly didn't think would effect them whatsoever but Larmal claims it took down the site for a day so hey, bonus. Larmal then informed me that he had a devious, evil plan to get back at me which turned out to be just a copy of the hatemail button I made, but this time in a form. I heard this took him all day to code which is really quite funny as a simple forwarding rule on my linux box shot all those emails right back to him. I sometimes tire of being the best

I then took it upon myself to rip of EJs site design, and I did so manually using nothing more than a text editor. This took a couple hours and personally I can't wait to get back to my original design. By personally skimming through all the source php and html code on the EJ pages I can say without a doubt that this is the most inefficient, cluttered mess of html that I have ever seen in my life! No wonder it doesn't load properly in Netscape. Got news for you guys, drop Dreamweaver and learn how to code html on your own.

Through this war I have made new enemies, namely Skinny Elvis. I would like to take this time to thank SE for his generous compliments to my site, an accomplishment that I believe earns me the right to call myself a jerk. An 'Extreme Jerk' if you will. Larmal and JayB have not only sold out repeatedly, but have consistently maintained a site that not only displays the gayest blue colors in the spectrum proudly and boldly, but hosts articles which with the possible exception of Jerky Clay, have no 'Extreme'ness to them at all. Even now that they are hosted on the notoriously slow bla-bla servers and have permission to use any content they want, there has been very little change in their content at all.

I don't know what to say guys, except that I expected better from you. I end this war now by my own forfeit, because there is nothing more to gain. I have proven that I, Spitfire of Rappablords, am the only EXTREME JERK in this war, and that in itself is reason enough to celebrate. A bid you all goodnight!

Attack from EJ?
update | Thursday June 1st | Spitfire
Finally, a sign of life from EJ. It seems that my old friend Larmal has developed a funny little script that sends hatemails to me. Sounds original, hey? :)

Either way, a simple forwarding rule is now sending them all back to him so I have nothing to worry about, I actually encourage you all to fill it out, but instead of finding the script on their site please follow this link so that they get less pageviews and therfore get less revenue.

Larmal claims there is an even bigger surprise coming, I just can't wait! This is so exciting!

"A weak man, protects not only his weakness, but cover's it with his own strengths. Strengths that do not exist, are only showing the true heart of a coward"

-Dog Pound (in his younger days)

Also, the hatemail button has been upgraded to Version 2.0 ... meaning that now for every press Jay B receives about 20 emails and so does larmal. Emails to Skinny pElvis have been bouncing...seems his account has been disabled or something.

Wow! New Site Layout!
update | Thursday June 1st | Spitfire
So I've got a new layout, like it? Kinda homely I think so I'm not sure if I'm going to keep it or not. Apparently the Rappablords<>EJ war is still on although things seem to be pretty quiet around here while I'm still waiting for the big 'Revenge Attack'. Oh well, I guess I will keep on waiting! *YAWN*

Fuck, what's up with that EJ site? I'd rather play naked twister with everyone of the golden girls than endure another one of Jay's terrible comics. And don't get me started on their articles. DAMN. Rappablords is fucking KING!

-Dog Pound

Also, Razor has joined the war on our side today, check out the title of his page for proof. With him on our side, there is no chance for EJ.

Wednesday May 31st, 2000

The war is still on!
update | Wednesday May 31st | spitfire
ell, its been a long month (for me anyway) but it's finally over. Went to see Mission Impossible II tonight, it wasn't bad but it could have been much more original.

It seems JayB has an opinion of my recent attacks towards him. If he had any communication with Larmal then he may have noticed him posting this in my message board...

Spitfire you asshole! Our site isn't even loading today.... you fucker..... floodping me will you? you fucking cunt... I'm gonna kick yer ass right before I fuck it.

Of course, I too suspected that nothing would come out of the attack but supposedly it did so hey, nice surprise. As for the emails, they were going to jayb@extremejerks.com, which I just remembered is no longer active because with your awesome webspace provider you can only have one, lame email account.

Also, I was promised a quick and sweet revenge, however you keep me waiting. My friends, this war is growing stale. If revenge is a dish best served cold, there would be no finer time than now. Freakin' -5C out there gah...

I am sorry for the lame update but I have a job interview tomorrow and I need time to get ready so see all you idiots tomorrow. Watch out for tomorrow's update, its going to be a good one. That is, if my site is able to sustain the inevitable wrath of the l33t haX0rs at EJ.

I am sorry for the lame update but I have a job interview tomorrow and I need time to get ready so see all you idiots tomorrow. Watch out for tomorrow's update, its going to be a good one. That is, if my site is able to sustain the inevitable wrath of the l33t haX0rs at EJ.

Tuesday May 30th, 2000

The Floodping War!
update | Tuesday May 30th | spitfire
mmmm...now this whole EJ<->Rappablords war is getting interesting. To tell you the truth, this whole thing started out as a little joke between sites to help gain a few more hits but I'm afraid it has become much more than that. You see, even though I have been trying to defend Larmal lately, he has turned against me. I think it is about time that everybody out there take a good look at who is a really good friend of theirs and who would stab them in the back the first chance they got.

No matter.

Current word is that they are going to do something 'aweful' to my site tomorrow, I just can't wait. Why? Because I happen to know that I am twice the l33t HaX0r JayB ever will be, and will get him back twice as worse even if it means sacrificing the Rappablords website.

Oh, and seems as though Rappablords has aquired a new enemy, Skinny pElvis. I don't know whats funnier, the fact that some gay little excuse of an internet script kiddie managed to wrestle the mouse away from his slut of a mother for just long enough to post a complaint about my site, or the fact that in an estatic rage of incoherent self-ratification and pro-countenance, this weasle of a character managed to concoct some pitiful 'nickname' which does nothing more than represent the obvious incompetence and embarrasing proportions of his own penis.

Either way, I am happy to announce that now everytime the hatemail button is pushed (now moved onto the sidebar), Jay B will be sent one email and Skinny pElvis will be sent 3. Also, both Jay and Skinny pElvis will be signed up for free online subscriptions to YM.

I just got this email from Unit3:

--- extremejerks.com ping statistics ---
57255 packets transmitted, 53499 packets received, +1634 duplicates,
6% packet loss
round-trip min/avg/max = 62.6/98.8/566.3 ms

Good work everybody, keep up the attack and don't stop until they quit being so grumpy about it.

Monday May 29th, 2000

Larmal is a true Canadian Hero
nothing | Monday May 29th, | spitfire
Boo hoo, looks like Rappablords may just have to shut down because Jay B is going to rat me out to the @home network. Little does he know, I actually have a contract with @home, who gets 50% of all profits made by this site.

And perhaps I was being a bit rash by poking fun at the loading speed of Extreme Jerks, but you'd think that a corporate webhosting service would be able to supply adequate bandwidth...especially more than my wimpy little P200 on a cable line can...but then again I don't get near as many hits as they do. Also, as days go by I feel more and more sorry for that poor Larmal fellow, who is the true heart behind EJ and always has been. A dark shadow past over the EJ site the day that he allowed JayB to do updates. tsk tsk.

I would like to take a moment to dedicate today's update to my personal hero, Larmal, a man of dreams, a man of mystery, and most of all the man behind everything that EJ once stood for. It is truely sad that their site had to sellout as it did, but I hope that we could all remember the site it once was, when it was all about rock and roll. Is there something you can do you ask? Why yes, there is!

Today is EJ Denial of Service day!!

Many people do not know how easy it is to annoy other sites and sometimes even take them down. Today I encourage everyone to help bring down EJ. How? It's easy!

If you are using linux (preferred) or some derivative of a Unix-style operating system, and you have access to the 'root' account, simply type the following line:

ping -f extremejerks.com

For best results, this command should be left executing for at least 24 hours. If you are using a windows machine, this gets a little bit more difficult. Windows does not come with built in functionality to floodping other people, but you CAN still ping them. As of right now (3:00AM May 29th) I am beginning my floodping.

If you are too lazy to participate in this war, the least you can do is press the following button which will send JayB hatemail...

Please feel free to press this button as many times as you feel neccesary.